a continuation of the post below

So a challenging week it has been for sure.. One I can't say I was ready for.. My energy is at the ground.. When u loose that will to live I guess and be productive u loose ur energy to.. But I have to say this too.. Its not that I've lost my will to live... but that driving force I usually lack its just not there anymore.. I know I talked about this... but litterally I can't place it I feel somewhat empty.. Not hurt or something like that... but more there's alarge part of my hearts that's missing I'm just not sure where its gone too. So what does a a girl do when she doesn't know what to do when she has lost herself to something but she's not sure what and lacks the passion and the drive to move forward.. If ur thinking well this is an intense subject well u would be right it is... its almost if I'm drawing a blank and I'm trying so desperatley to fill it or I have but now I've just given up and it wasn't by anymeans a concious choice I mean I just realized it today... and u know I've learned other things that placing blame is no good... its no ones fault but my own.. My raising my upbringing my parents my co workers my friends on line and off haven't a thing to do with it.... I created my own problems I'm my own person and I have my own problems to deal with as my own... I used to do that lay blame in fact I can go back and look to see where exactly I did lay blame.. But not so much anymore.. Its my fault and I know it.. Now I just don't know what to do about it... ill find a way I certainly usually do.. But the way out iof this maze well lets hope I've got a compas to use because there's lots of twists and turns and no internet resources or handy cell phones to help solve anything....